Archive for the ‘let’s get real!’ Category

It might seem odd to you to see this post here, but someone reached out to me via my linkedn.com account and mentioned this book: My Body Belongs to Me Written by Jill Starishevsky is a prosecutor of child abuse and sex crimes in New York City, Starishevshky penned this book to Me to teach children that if someone touches them inappropriately to tell a parent or teacher right away.

This book is child-friendly and very accessible and speaks to them on their own ground and in their own terms. This highly acclaimed book sensitively establishes boundaries for youngsters in a non-threatening, engaging manner. Think of it as a guide that teaches kids that when it comes to their body, that there are some parts that are for “no one else to see” and empowers them to tell a parent or teacher if someone touches them inappropriately. Handled quite deftly, this narrative assures children of any age that sexual molestation is not their fault, and by speaking out, the child will continue to grow big and strong. Extremely important is the post-story discussion section entiteld “Suggestions for the Storyteller” to help parents, care-givers, and educators a path to encourage a comfortable discussion afterwards, thereby helping to prevent the unthinkable from happening to any child. Given the Oscar-nominated movie now out on DVD, Precious, and Mo’nique’s Oscar win for “Precious”. Mo’nique’s eloquence concerning child sexual abuse, it’s apparent we — as a society– not only need to have a grasp on this discussion, but on this burning issue. Considering that 1 in 4 girls and 1 in 6 boys will be sexually molested are not statistics that can be ignored. This is horrifying and would probably be higher if parents and educators made sure that kids knew that they could be safe in “telling” on someone who has touched them inappropriately. One might think that parents/family, educators and physicians are addressing this matter with our children to keep them tools and help prevent them from becoming victims in the first place. Unfortunately, many parents do not know how or when to begin when it comes to discussing child sexual abuse prevention and so they avoid the discussion entirely. This approach (or lack of approach) puts our children at risk. Finally, there is a tool to make the discussion as easy as.. well as easy as reading a book to a child. This book enables anyone– from the clergy, physicians, parents/family and also educators to address this issue safely and honestly. The illustrations are well done and the message of what is right and wrong is compelling and encouraging. My Body Belongs to Me is highly recommended by parents, teachers, physicans and widely used by experts in conjunction with their child safety presentations.

Comments and endorsements from other organizations and notables.

“With an easy rhyme and attractive pictures, this book will help both adults and children enter into a conversation about a subject that is often extremely hard for anyone to speak about, privately or publicly.” -Pamela Pine, PhD, MPH Founder and CEO Stop the Silence: Stop Child Sexual Abuse, Inc., www.stopcsa.org

“Prevention is key when it comes to children’s personal safety. Kudos to Ms. Starishevsky for taking on this project.” -Kimberley Clayton Blaine, MA, MFT Licensed family and child therapist, Founder, www.TheGoToMom.TV

“The author skillfully captures an extremely difficult subject using simple language any child can understand.” -Christine Louise Hohlbaum Author, “Diary of a Mother: Parenting Stories and Other Stuff”

This is an important– and necessary– book given today’s world. When you look at “PRECIOUS” and realize that this is happening all over the world– not just the US — and it’s cruel beyond belief for the child because they are told never to tell — and that it’s their fault which destroys the child forever. Give children the power to tell and reinforce it. Why is this coming up here? Because as a child, I was sexually molested and it haunted me for a long time. I told my mother– yet she did nothing because she didn’t know what to do. I was told to never tell because no one would ever want me. Imagine what it was like to grow up thinking no one would ever want me– and the decades of therapy I have gone through to get to the strength to say, yes I can stand up and fight for others. I have done my time volunteering at shelters and child abuse centers. Here is one more easily accessible tool that will make it easy for you to protect your children– or the children of others.

What’s your “perfect world”? LPW

Shifting Tides

I am driven to the edge by feelings of anger and lust which consume me. Filled with shame and guilt, betrayed by a future that may only come to pass as a product of madness. Should such a price be paid that freedom of mind can only be gained by complete and utter denial of that which lies dormant within myself,–that which is innate and vital to the very core of my existence?

• Am I to believe that all I have ever felt must be discarded and forgotten?
• Where is the honor in that?
• What is the truth?

By whose laws do I persist in the world and whose will is it that my unchosen path seems to resist?

If all that is real can only be manifest at the total dissolution of myself then am I insane not to long for some solemn gesture of retreat back into the dream? Should I not loathe my awakening?

Is that not the paradox which faces every man seeking answers in the waning hours of the night? Once awakened to the light, you can never again escape into the twilight like the shadows of the early morning occurring just before the sun is born into the day.

To fight what ‘is’ no longer presents itself as a choice. The rules that governed your progress have been destroyed. You fate is no longer written in the stars. You are free!

Lifting your head up and moving forward is all that remains. Yesterday is gone and you must realize that the keys to tomorrow can only be acquired before the setting of our most local star. Who is it that has lost his way?

Who is it that is crossing the threshold and now sees his path?

Is denying the self for the benefit of the many really all that different from denying the many for the benefit of the self? At the climax of all things, was there truly ever any difference at all?

Our minds foolishly stricken with duality, our perception is flawed. Consciousness could not perceive itself and so we are divided. So, here we are at last. Why?

There is nothing…

But I still don’t understand. Don’t worry, we weren’t meant to understand.

Just be as you are and follow the shifting tides of you mind.

Jeheshua

What’s your “perfect world”?
LPW

The Only Way

I guess that on some level I have always understood how impossible it is to save everyone, but only recently have I come to realize the utter futility of what is wrong, but I cannot fix it. We must all come to grips with our own fate. We must fend for ourselves in a world full of wolves.

Each one of us has a quest to fulfill, a setback to overcome and a decision to make. We are all born into a dream and you can only be awakened of your own accord. There is no help to be had by another, One is one and not other. Amongst a world of many ,we are alone on our journey.

The answers we seek can only be sought within, and any attempt to assist another will only cripple them in the long run. If I take your suffering upon myself, then I deprive you of a lesson you were meant to learn. Life does not make mistakes. Life is without remorse, and life’s lessons will not be denied! We are always offered lessons in the lightest capacity. Our problem is we ignore them and in so doing force a stronger event to be set in motion.

Our eyes are sewn shut, our ears are plugged up and our hearts are encased in stone. We are pawns to the outside world, to our families , to our friends, to society and most all to our chosen God.

We refuse to accept what we have created, and always we blame others in the place of ourselves. We seek escape at every turn in the maze driven by panic, anger and fear. We are lost, but eventually we will find the way. Eventually we will realize the truth. Eventually we will learn to help ourselves.

It is not one way. It is the only way and all paths will lead to it…………………eventually.

Jeheshua

What’s your “perfect world”?
LPW

Between the Lines

Over the years I have learned to express myself through my writing and I like to think of myself as good. However, this ability is not something which can be turned on at will. It is beyond me in a sense. When my pen touches paper, something happens which is not wholly of myself, but which is not all together different. What happens is a thing of beauty, a gift, and a total surprise. It is something that exists in absence of my control, and until now, I have never made an attempt to explain it.

You see, I, myself, understand what is going on in the subtext of this story. After all, who better to arrange a director’s cut than the director? However, to make you understand will take some work. So please consider this to be an attempt to that end and have some level of understanding for I am new to this branch of writer’s scope (introspection).

Words do not just form out of thin air, despite the use of my tools, pen and paper, I do not claim to have molded them in the same way that a sculptor molds a piece of clay into a statue.

What happens is something closer to that of a duet or a collaboration of sorts. To the majority of the world the only possible truth of story composition (or composition in general) is that I, the author, have created, out of my own mind, an original and totally self oriented piece of writing, but nothing could be further from the truth. True, I did not copy someone else’s word in order to pass them off as my own. However, I wouldn’t describe my writing as creating. A musician doesn’t create music. In reality, the music already exists. All he does is rearrange the notes to exist in harmony with one another. My gift is the same. My pen and paper are instruments, the forum of language is the scale of notes and my finished essays, poems, etc are songs. They are songs of the mind.

Which brings us to another question. If I did not create these songs, then whose mind did?

My answer is very simple……….”You did” . Sounds crazy, right? Do you know why that sounds crazy? I sounds because your thought matrix cannot process it in the same context that I am explaining it. In your linear brain construct things are self-sustaining and separate. Time seems to move in a straight line, but in reality things are more complex.

Jeheshua

What’s your “perfect world”?
LPW

IT’S FUNNY

Raining in the mind. Who or what gives us the idea that we are capable of controlling that which governs our lives? How do you use the mind to control the mind? It is impossible! One will reach certain madness before any perfection can be attained. In fact, I believe if perfection of wisdom were ever truly reached it would cause a breakdown in the system of existence itself. If anyone were to fully realize their infinite power of divinity it would cause all of existence to cease.

The dream we now live in is a self sustaining one and we are all key players in its ongoing cycle. Not only that, but I believe, without a doubt , that we are its’ creator. Our concepts of reality are not only side effects of its occurrence, they are the cause of reality itself. One could not perceive itself within itself as a result, one created division. Once division was created relation between two or more objects rendered very much information, but the one (or “none” as would have it) lost consciousness of itself and was blinded by the dream it had created.

Now here trapped in this cell, this illusion of emptiness, we are all called home. Though most of us don’t hear nor understand the true meaning of the screams for attainment that well up from within. We attempt to fill this bottomless pit with material possessions and worldly pleasures. We do not see beyond this veil of negative existence. Some hear the screams and form them into an idol of worship. I am not that type at all. I do not see an answer. I don’t even understand the question. All I know is nothing at all. There is not enlightenment in this world because the very nature of dwelling in this world negates such a possibility. You can’t light a match under water!

The realization of that fact is all we could ever hope to reach but only a fool would ever hope for more . Only a fool would fail to see the humor in it all.

Jeheshua

What’s your “perfect world”?
LPW

How Many

Since 2004, I have been a prisoner and for good reason. I was convicted of two counts of Aggravated Involuntary Manslaughter, for the taking of two innocent lives in a drunk driving accident. I was sentenced and remanded to a prison within the United States Department of Corrections. My earliest possible release will be not be for several years.

As on who has carried the burden of his actions, I understand all too well what I have taken. I have hurt so many people by my ignorance that early morning in the summer of early 2002. For what I have taken I am indebted, not just to the families of my victims, but to all of humanity. I cannot fix what I have done. It is beyond any man to change his past, but my future is another story.

It is for that future that I now write. Every so often I come across a news story about a fatal car crash that involved somebody like me. Every time I wonder ‘could that have been the one that I prevented?’

There are so many young ignorant kids out there who are either unable or unwilling to acknowledge the fact that their actions have consequences. They are unable or unwilling to see the fact that what they do affects others as well. I believe with all of my heart that my story could help to open their eyes, but in my current state, I am unable to reach them.

There are a few things that judges, lawmakers and the general public need to know about most people who commit this type of ‘crime’. This crime is not one which is motivated by malice. Buy the very wording of the charge itself…involuntary etc….one would assume that this concept was a given. Yet despite a persons lack of intention, life is still lost. Our purpose as a society should not be to punish the ignorant, but to insure that this doesn’t happen in the future.

You have to understand that nobody is afraid of going to jail for a DUI. How many people are killed by drunk drivers each year, how many are convicted and thrown into prison and how much does the rate of fatal DUI accidents differ as a result of those prison sentences? You cannot train a dog by constantly beating him. Fear has never bee, is not and never will be the answer to this problem.

The answer is awareness. The answer is in the enlightening of ignorant minds by using the life experience of those who have been through an ordeal like my own. Victims and offenders need to come tighter and use their collective stories to open the eyes of a public that believes, much like I once did, that this is something that happens and to other people.

As long as people believe that they are in control of their own lives and that they are above this type of occurrence, they will never fear the law. Why fear a prison sentence for something which could not possibly happen to you? How does anyone learn the consequences if nobody is there to teach them?

I was 21 years old and I was on top of the world. Nothing could touch me. I could make it home. Why not? I’d done it so many times before. I am them! I’m your child! Don’t you see? Tougher sentences are not the answer. We have to reach the hears and minds of these people by showing them how much pain one mistake can cause. Prison time has not hurt me in the ways that I thought it would. I can deal with living without for a while, but how many people can live without my story and stories like it. Just like the two victims who perished , how many innocent people will die because someone like myself never got to hear a story that could have changed their lives forever” ?

How Many?

Jeheshua

What’s your “perfect world”?
LPW

Manipulation — part 2

Many people steal, rob, and manipulate to get by. That is just the nature of prison. We are just victims of our environment. To most people who live outside, we deserve everything we get because ” let’s face it, we are criminals”. . I mean we are different aren’t we? Then again, maybe we are all the same.

Aren’t our prisons just a reflection of our society’s biggest flaws ? In reality, a chin is only as strong as its’ weakest link . The problem isn’t truly crime and criminals. The real problem is the necessities and traits that create crime and criminals. The real problem is poverty. We can’t just lock everyone up and hope they are rehabilitating themselves. We have to help them. We have to realize that prisoners are no different than citizens. We all lie, manipulate and steal to a certain degree. If your survival depended on how well you could manipulate another human being, you would become very good at it.

People sell drugs to feed their families. In return, addicts lie, cheat and steal to feed their addiction. These problems no longer belong to criminals alone. They belong to us all as one nation as one world. Our culture is falling apart because we have become so selfish and insecure that we would build our lives on the failures of others. . We take advantage of each other. I am a criminal, but the guy on Wall Street who just embezzled 2 billion dollars is a hero. We hurt each other everyday and our children see us do it. What do you think they will do when given the chance.

As a nation, we can fix this, but we need to stop looking at what everyone else is doing wrong and start looking in the mirror. I have accepted responsibility for my actions and I am doing my best to steer my ever-changing life in a better direction.

What about you?

Jeheshua.

What’s your “perfect world”?
LPW

Manipulation

When I was housed at a major institution, I thought that I had seen it all, I thought that I had encountered every dirty, underhanded trick, ever crooked angle and heard every possible lie in existence, but I was wrong, Now, here at a road-camp for low security level prisoners, I must endure more. So very different in appearance, this place is still so very much the same.

Everything about this place differs but only on the surface. When it comes right down to it, most people that I have met are all right, but there are those who play games. They will try to befriend you–not because they think you are funny or because you have things in common, but because they are in need of your help (so to speak). They are either broke, scared or they believe that they can manipulate you into making their situation better.

There are a few different approaches. Let’s start at the top. One way is to lend you something when you first arrive so that when they ask for your assistance later on, you will feel obligated. Another way is the old “poor me” scam. (This is the one that is the hardest to spot if done correctly). They have soup, but if they only had crackers or if they have soup and crackers, but if only they had some cheese. Then they have soup, crackers and cheese but if only they had a soda. The good ones never actually ask for anything. They just subtly imply and because of your pity, you give what you can.

There are many different ways to use another human being but in the end, the result is always the same. The people who do these things are actors (very good ones at that) They are your friends and associates up until the moment that you find out the truth and for many it is too late. After all, this is a prison and there is not much room for mistakes.

Jeheshua

What’s your “perfect world”?
LPW

Enlightenment

“What is real? What is dreamt? And what, my friends, is the difference? ”

When I was growing up, the passing moments of my life seemed so trivial. They seemed to be so unimportant and as a result I never paid much attention to the changes that I imposed upon the world around me– the world that sustained me. The world that I would one day help destroy.

Now with my world so utterly reased from existence by my own hand, I am force to live in someone else’s world. I am force to live someone else’s lies. I am force to follow someone else’s rules and there is no one to blame for this current state of affairs except myself.

So with all of this established, I guess the only remaining question would be , “what now?” Do I rebel or do I make the best of what I have? I struggle to ask myself that question everyday. I struggle to ask it so that I will never forget what is at stake. Things like my sanity, my freedom, and my true place in this jigsaw puzzle called life.

I have realized that I can no longer live in the wake of my past mistakes. That life that has passed is no longer viable. It is no more tangeable than the dreamscape plot of a Sunday afternoon nap. In opposition, I have recognized I can no longer feed upon daydreams of a future that has yet to be written.

What has happened is gone and what will be will be . the only truth left is now. Here in this moment, I can find freedom, Here in this moment, I can let go of the prejudice that keeps me frozen still in a world of constant change. Here and now life’s imperfect beauty is pure. Here is where we realize that perfection lies in our ability to understand that it doesn’t exist. Now is when we finally see that our flaws are our greatest source of hope, and to see and realize those two truths is the very basis of a spiritual life. In fact, I would call it enlightenment.

Jeheshua

GODS

anyone who struggles will adapt and grow. That is a natural law. The trick is the correct amount of the pressure in the right area to reap the required results. Growth is a good thing when one grows in the right direction.

All roads will eventually lead to the same destination. However some travelers will reach that destination much sooner and with less scrapes and bruises . If one reaches a state of harmony with their true will then they will be in harmony with the surrounding universe. And if they abide in such harmony then they will transcend any accepted concept of pain and suffering.

If any instance of suffering is taken as a mere feedback and used for the sole purpose of learning from that particular moment of life experience then every future moment of apparent pain and suffering will be transformed into a direct cause of enlightenment.

The key is to let go of the urge to escape situations that we perceive as a threat to our ego selves and to embrace all of life wholeheartedly. We must take hold of the wheel and steer ourselves to freedom. Your demons are just as much a part of you as your God is. If you attempt to deny the influx of the realization into your life thank you debase the most basic law of our existence. Without darkness there can be no light. Without evil, how would we know good and without pain, we could never fully grown into the Gods that we were meant to become.

Jeheshua

What’s your “perfect world”?
LPW